I am in a relationship! Can I still have attraction? (My Real Talk)

I am in a relationship! Can I still have attraction? (My Real Talk)


This is a topic, that has been on my spirit, for a long time, and for me to write this, I had to really go to a place, where I have to make people feel, un comfortable, being that this is real talk, I have to touch on certain topics, that many of you, want to hear more about you are just afraid. However, in order for love to grow, we must always live in “truth”.

When we are in relationships? We make so many mistakes, not that we want to make mistakes, but when we attain these relationships, we start to learn these hidden truths about not only ourselves but also the mate, that God has placed us with.

In order for me to write this blog, I had to once again enter my very own “ love data base” and talk about the issues, that I also have dealt with in the past, as well as most of the issues that couples deal with everyday. Why are we starting to let insecurity and Satan destroy our relationships? Come on people! That’s the mission of the world, is to mess up what God has given to you, and you must stand firm in the knowing that “fear” can destroy something so precious, along with insecurity.

I decided to title this topic, this way, because for some strange reason, we as human beings, have this weird notion that when we enter into relationships, that we become blind! And unattractive to the opposite sex, and let’s be honest here, that is just wrong.

To be very honest, once we settle into the relationships, that’s when visual temptation truly takes over. Ladies, we must stop accusing our men, of lusting after other women, why is it, that if we are out with our guy, And the minute a pretty girl walks by, we are already rolling our eyes, and moving our necks and doing the worst thing, we can do to our men “ accusations” Now, in our mind we are already knowing that this girl is pretty, and unless your guy is dead or gay, he is going to look. Now, I know most of my girls out there, are getting angry, but ladies we can not, walk this earth, thinking that our men can not be attracted to other women, attraction is what it is. Nothing more.

Unless the man has crossed the line, and enter the world “ of infidelity” we must take it easy on them.

Ok, now men you know I was not going to let you slide, come on this is real talk! Even though we know, that you are visual creatures, you must respect your lady at all times, it is a difference in gawking at someone and glancing over at someone casually, the moment that you have looked for more than 5 seconds and you continue to keep looking, you have disrespected your woman. That’s not good!!

So, here it is this is the bottom line, we are going to still be attracted to the opposite sex not matter what! And we must accept, you are not doing anything wrong, we are human, and its human nature for us to be attracted to others, however ladies and gentlemen, we must be secure within our selves and trust our partners. Stop allowing the wilds of Satan, to destroy are relationships, ladies if you keep accusing your man of cheating, don’t be surprised if you are not giving him the extra boost of going out, and seeking someone one else. “ You must trust” Ok, and for you men, you must not give women, any reasons to accuse you, don’t be “ gawkers” it’s ok, to find another woman attractive, however “ never” disrespect your woman, by constant eyeing that’s not right.

You know I learned a valuable lesson in my last relationship, and it taught me, that the only time Satan can attack your relationship, is if you let him in, so don’t! And trust and believe if you are in a relationship that is already broken, it just takes that opportunity and the push of “accusations” to send your mate to the arms of someone else, one of my favorite musicians and singers John Legend has a song entitled “ Here we go again” and it speaks about the struggles of being in a relationship when we allow all that pollution to enter in and destroy us, going back and forth. Let’s stop going back and forth, appreciate what God has given to you, and love your partner and trust them, most of “ Trust God” and if it’s in his alignment there is noting that can destroy.

This has been another topic, that I have enjoyed writing, the best thing about “love” is that it conquers all when it is real, and if a relationship is built on a lie, or a need, it was never put together in Gods will, let go and let God…

Remember the most valuable thing we have in life, is Love: it’s universal and never dies, and Time: you can never get it back! So love hard and enjoy! Life is to short to live it in misery.


Smart Diva

One Love and One Blood ( shed for you and me)